Saturday, February 13, 2021

The Buffer Brothers: Crazy True Life Story Of Bruce And Michael Buffer

In case you fight fans didn't know, Michael Buffer is a famous boxing & wrestling ring announcer who is 'world-renowned' for his trademarked catchphrase, "Let's get ready to rumble!"

What makes this story even more intriguing is that his younger half-brother — Bruce Buffer — is a popular mixed martial arts octagon announcer who also has a signature catchphrase, "It's time!"



Soledad O'Brien sits down with the enterprising duo to learn more about their inspiring story, and how it led to the birth of the Buffer Partnership. Real Sports debuts Tues., May 20 at 10pm ET/PT on HBO. 


“The feeling that overtook me was (A) I’m a big fan of his work and a fan of what he does, but (B) this is my blood. This is my brother. I’m hit by a kind of double whammy. It was a wonderful night. I was just so happy we all got along.”

For much of their lives, Michael Buffer and Bruce Buffer led separate existences -- Michael with his foster parents, Bruce with his birth parents -- connected and unconnected, as intertwined and radically different as boxing and UFC.

Monday, September 28, 2020

Luke Voit: Origins Story | New York Yankees


According to the first baseman, however, the procedure not only repaired the problem but combined with the post-surgery rehab work has significantly improved other areas of his well-built 6-foot-3, 225-pound frame. “I have never felt any better in my life. It’s everything. I feel faster, more agile and my strength is back,” Voit told The Post while driving through Atlanta on his way from Missouri to Tampa on Saturday. 
"That’s part of my success, having to fail a lot.” Here's a deep dive into where Luke Voit came from and how he's become the man and baseball player he is today.

22 HR 52 RBI .277 AVG

Yankees first baseman Luke Voit talks about what it takes for a successful at-bat and why he’s incorporated the “Sammy Hop” after a home run swing.

Sunday, August 9, 2020

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night | August 8th, 2020

NBA's Top 10 Plays Of The Night | August 8th, 2020

Check out the top 10 plays of the night from the NBA Restart on August 8, featuring Luka Doncic, LeBron James, Kristaps Porzingis and more!

21-yr-old phenom strikes again w/ NBA's leading 17th triple-double: 36 pts • 17 rebs • 19 asts

Wednesday, October 23, 2019

Top 5 NBA Plays Of The Night | October 22nd, 2019

Top 5 NBA Plays Of The Night
October 22nd, 2019

Check out the top 5 plays of the night from around the league on Oct. 22 featuring Kawhi Leonard, Lonzo Ball, LeBron James and more!

Saturday, October 19, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night | October 18th, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night
October 18th, 2019

Check out the top 10 plays of the night from around the league on Oct. 18 featuring Kendrick Nunn, Jahlil Okafor, RJ Barrett and more!

Friday, October 18, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night | October 17th, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night
October 17th, 2019

Check out the top 10 plays of the night from around the league on Oct. 17 featuring Zach LaVine, Karl-Anthony Towns, Wendell Carter Jr. and more!

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night | October 16th, 2019

Top 10 NBA Plays Of The Night
October 16th, 2019

Check out the top 10 plays of the night from around the league on Oct. 16 featuring Trae Young, LeBron James and more!

Monday, April 15, 2019

Asian Baby Boss


Toddler uses steel pipe to defend grandmother from Chinese authorities

“A toddler is being hailed as a miniature hero on Chinese social media after he defended his grandmother from urban management officers who were trying to clamp down on illegal street vendors.

The video of the toddler standing up to the grown men has gone viral, and shows the boy picking up a long steel pipe, wielding it like a weapon and repeatedly yelling: "Don't touch my grandma!"

The boy's actions cracked many eyewitnesses up, but has also earned him plenty of compliments from Chinese netizens for his brazen contempt toward authority.” — Alicia Tan | Mashable

Saturday, December 29, 2018

Carlos Santana The Designer?

Latino Designers We Love: Carlos Santana

Carlos Santana can do more than play a sick tune on his guitar. Have you checked out his hottest shoes and bags? Here, he tells us how he got into fashion.

How did you get into designing women's shoes and bags?
I was looking for another passion to express my creativity while simultaneously supporting my philanthropic efforts through The Milagro Foundation, and making females happy through my shoe and handbag lines has given me tremendous satisfaction. If the females are happy then everyone is happy.

Does your music inspire your designs?
My musical state of mind is always part of every part of the Carlos Santana brand, whether it's a handbag or a shoe or a fedora. Melody is the woman and rhythm is the man. Both are necessary and feed off each other in music as in fashion.

What advice would you have for someone wanting to start their own line or business?
Focus, focus, focus! Go after your dream, have a point of view and be true to yourself, believe in yourself and your dream, dreams do come true if you believe and work from the heart.

What were some of the challenges you faced in starting out and how did you overcome them?
In general, there haven't been any serious challenges because failure isn't much of an option for me. At first, though, it was hard for people to associate me with footwear and handbags, but eventually once people saw the quality and style, which spoke to their aesthetic, we were given permission through trust and even more doors opened.

Describe your customer?
I'm always looking for a new color or feeling or sensation, so there's nothing ho-hum or 'been there, done that' about my existence. I feel that this transcends the brand and the people who wear my creations. My customer is a person who is not emotionally invested in fear, and that makes her supremely attractive. She is confident, a go-getter, the woman who knows who she is and what she wants, understands style and trend and wants to be fashionable.

What would you say is your design signature?
Symetry of color, texture and confidence that makes the woman who wears or carries my products feel special while inspiring and transcending her confidence and inner balance.

What tips would you give our reader on wearing your shoes (when, where, how, with what fashions)?
Walk like you own clarity, peace of mind, good health and happiness. Utilize my Carlos by Carlos Santana shoes, bags and hats to compliment and make your outfit. Create your own unique style by embracing your individuality and your own true self.

Best piece of fashion advice for women?
Follow your heart and your own style, be who you are, be comfortable and do what speaks to you – embrace your individuality.

Celeb you'd most like to see in your shoes?
I like to see celebrities, as well as all women, that exude femininity, individuality and supernatural style, just like who my customer is. If I had to pick one, she'd have to embody all of that and have exceptionally pretty feet! — Niria Portella | Cosmopolitan 

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

theORIGINS: Heath Ledger's Joker

The Dark Knight: How Heath Ledger's Joker Was Born

Oscar-winning make-up artist John Caglione, Jr. retraces the steps of creating the ultimate version of the Clown Prince of Crime on The Dark Knight’s 10th anniversary.

When The Dark Knight was released in the U.S. on July 18, 2008, it was immediately clear that not only had director Christopher Nolan elevated the superhero movie genre to something approaching high art, but that an iconic take on a classic character had also emerged from the endeavor: Heath Ledger’s dark, scary and more realistic take on Batman’s age-old nemesis, the Joker.

On the occasion of The Dark Knight’s 10th anniversary, we spoke with make-up artist John Caglione, Jr., who was nominated for an Academy Award for his work on The Dark Knight along with Conor O'Sullivan. Caglione had previously won an Oscar for his makeup on Dick Tracy back in 1991, so he came into The Dark Knight with some very relevant experience in the realm of creating grotesqueries. But when it came to birthing a new version of the Joker, the makeup artist quickly realized that he would be crossing into some new and uncomfortable terrain.

“So I read the script for The Dark Knight, and having seen the first one of Chris Nolan’s trilogy, I got the feeling it was going to be more of kind of an organic-looking thing,” Caglione explains. “It was going to be kind of real, not so comic book-y. Going in, and then talking to Chris, meeting him, it became a more realistic approach to the makeup. … What would it be if this guy slept in this makeup? You know, this psychopath. If he didn’t spruce up his makeup for two or three weeks. And, you know, he never changes his clothes in the film. … It was those kinds of organic details that really helps.”

When Caglione joined the production, Ledger was already signed on to play the iconic villain. The makeup designer’s earliest meetings were with the actor, director, and costume designer Lindy Hemming, followed by Caglione creating five or six color sketches as overlays of headshots of Ledger complete with green hair, different kinds of clown makeup, scars, and so on. This was followed with some makeup tests with Ledger in London, but as the process continued, it became clear that Caglione had to abandon his artist’s instinct to get everything just right.

“You know, you go into it, and you’re trying, as a makeup artist, I’m always trained to do every little detail,” he says. “And you think of a clown makeup, and for the most part they’re pretty detailed with sharp lines, but this had to be the opposite of that. It had to look very broken down, very… very lived in. So, yeah, my first few times were too perfect, so I had to kind of let my hand go. And it was hard, it was really hard to do that. And I remember the first week, the first few days on set, I would look at the makeup, and you don’t know the context of the film and the overall vision, and you’re looking at it as a makeup artist. And I’m saying, this is the worst makeup in the world here! You know? And, it was like, oh, am I doing the right thing?

And you’re looking at all the great makeups in history,” he continues. “Not just the Joker, but Clarabell and so many other greats -- you know, Emmett Kelly. And they’re always just very accurate, very precise makeups, and then here comes this. Ahhh! But, thank God it all worked out, right?”

It’s easy to forget now, but before The Dark Knight was released, the standard bearer of Joker makeups was the Jack Nicholson version from Tim Burton’s 1989 Batman. But Caglione says that as far as he can recall, that design was never really discussed when creating the Ledger Joker. In fact, even the idea of the Joker’s white face being the result of an accident -- which is clearly the case in the Burton film -- just didn’t fit in the Nolan world of Batman.

“The first Batman was amazing,” says Caglione. “I love Nicholson’s makeup. And I love the whole approach that Tim Burton [took] … the comic book style of the film, it worked. Everything about that film was great. So, in the back of my mind, maybe subconsciously it was there, but no, it never came up in meetings or discussions. It was, let’s roll up our sleeves and make this thing look like a real person could have done this to themselves. … I think it was always discussed, that this was a possible -- you know, just a psychopath. A real person that just gets into this whole thing. It’s almost like a split personality. And so, yeah, it’s a madman in makeup. It’s that concept.”

Part of the “doing this to themselves” aspect of the character includes the question of those scars on either side of this Joker’s face. Of course, the film itself leaves the question of where the scars came from open to interpretation, as unknowable as the Joker’s ever-changing origin.

“I always got the impression that it was self-inflicted,” says Caglione. “But it’s up to you to decide. Was he punished, was it abuse? Was it an abusive situation? It could have been [and] that just tipped him over the edge. Mutilation, self-mutilation. We never really know for sure.”

Not surprisingly, Ledger himself was very involved in creating the makeup with Nolan and Caglione. Indeed, he was essential to getting the worn and cracked look of his Joker just right.

“It was great with Heath, it was just a great experience,” says Caglione. “He was a great person to work with every day. It was like a dance, because certain parts of the makeup, to get those cracks and all the drippy stuff, you really need the cooperation of the actor’s facial gestures when laying down the makeup and the paint. So we had a lot of fun together on that movie.”

Achieving the desired effect essentially involved Ledger acting in the makeup chair.

“He would contort his face or raise his eyebrows,” recalls Caglione. “Or I would even take one hand and kind of scrunch the corner of his eyes to create crows’ feet, you know, draw those wrinkles, and brush grays and white colors over it, and he would relax and you would get all these expressive lines and details that just come naturally. Listen, it’s an old theater trick. They were doing it in the turn of the century, the 1920s in theater. Actors would put white makeup on and scrunch their face and let it go, and then paint little brown lines. So it’s nothing that we really invented. It was a throwback to old makeup techniques.”

Another throwback in the design process came in the famous interrogation scene, where things get real rough between the Caped Crusader and the Clown Prince of Crime.

“So, Heath and I would always be like, gee, what could we do a little different toward the end of the sequence?” recalls Caglione. “And I remember one time we’re talking about the scene where he gets beat up by Batman. He’s in the jail cell. And at the end of the scene, he wanted to have a different look, Heath. And I was thinking about what we can do with the eyes, the black and stuff. And I went, you know, there was this great villain in the Chaplin films, he was played -- the actor was Eric Campbell, and he always played the big heavy in all the Chaplin movies. And he always had these big, black eyes that kind of had these black eyebrows. And Heath was like, well, let me see a picture. So I pulled it up, and we kind of went for that kind of look. It was a throwback to an old Chaplin villain from the silent screen days.”

According to Caglione, Christopher Nolan wasn’t the kind of director who said “I want you to do exactly this.” Instead, he would offer inspiration and guidance. Take, for example, the paintings of Francis Bacon that he brought to Ledger and Caglione early in the design process.

“I think it was his way of saying, let’s blur this, let’s loosen this up,” says Caglione. “Here’s a book, look at it, and maybe you’ll find some inspiration. And it really helped, you know, we turned a corner. He didn’t have to say much, but that was the way it kind of went. And then Heath helped me to relax. The great actors help you relax so you can really bring it, and you can just try different things and feel free to do it. But that Francis Bacon painting, that day that Chris came in and plopped that down and we went through some pages… He said, yeah, maybe look at this picture, look at that picture. I think he actually had some of the pictures tagged with Post-its that he likes. Just for inspiration.”

Funny enough, it was a Francis Bacon painting in the 1989 Batman that the Jack Nicholson Joker spared during his gang’s rampage in the Gotham City museum. Coincidence? Who can say?

Of course, sadly Heath Ledger passed away before The Dark Knight was released. He went on to receive a posthumous Oscar for the role, but had he not died, the actor could’ve returned as the Joker. Caglione recalls Ledger talking about his ideas for the character beyond The Dark Knight.

“Yes, he did, he actually did talk to me about it,” he says. “He wanted to… start at the Arkham Asylum. And his idea -- I don’t know if he ever talked to Chris. This is just private moments in the chair with Heath, and conversations like, wouldn’t it be great to go back and see what really happened to this guy, how he became what he became? And why he just, you know, flipped out and became maniacal? And he always thought it would be great to go back to the asylum, or even before that. So it was just chit-chat in the chair. … Because I’m sure as an actor, he needs to know the origins of the character; it’s really important to him.

“He was excited about the idea of going back in time, and seeing how he became the Joker. You know, the evolution of the character,” says Caglione. “It would have been cool. It would have been cool.”

Indeed, it would’ve been cool. But at least we’ll always have Heath Ledger’s amazing performance from The Dark Knight, and the unforgettable look of the character created by Christopher Nolan, John Caglione, Jr., Conor O'Sullivan, Lindy Hemming and, of course, Ledger himself. — Scott Cullura | IGN

Wednesday, September 19, 2018

theORIGINS: Your Beard Is Weird

theORIGINS: Your Beard Is Weird

Just for Men Just Right for Former Stars TV Sports

It was (and is) cheesy, hokey, goofy, silly and evidently effective. It was a cri de coeur to men that their moribund love lives could be resuscitated with brush-in facial hair gel. It was the Just for Men advertisement with Keith Hernandez and Walt Frazier as barside analysts of Miss Hottie’s brush-off of poor Mr. Graybeard.

“No play for Mr. Gray,” Frazier said, as if the sap had just had his jumper blocked.

It lacked the snap, crackle and pop of “Tastes great, less filling” or the cinematic élan of Mean Joe Greene’s Coca-Cola ad. But the original Hernandez-Frazier singles-bar pairing is still running after nearly five and a half years, outlasting a less-memorable follow-up — and still enriching two stars of graying age: Hernandez, 54, a Mets analyst for SportsNet New York, and Frazier, 62, MSG’s lead Knicks analyst.

“People used to stop me in the airport and ask, ‘Can I help you move?’” Hernandez said by telephone, alluding to his 1992 guest appearance on “Seinfeld.” Now, he added, “They say, ‘Rejected!’” a line that he and Frazier uttered in unison in the first ad.

Research showed Combe Inc., Just for Men’s parent company, that its target male buyers are not tired of the ad. “It’s so much a part of the vernacular,” said John Lerch, Combe’s chief advertising officer, worldwide. “The lines really play back.”

And, he said, the over-the-top production eases the reluctance of hair-coloring virgins.

The Hernandez-Frazier announcing tandem returned Saturday night (on the Jaguars-Steelers playoff game on NBC) with a new ad with the former Dallas Cowboy Emmitt Smith. He is first seen in a retirement home for running backs, rendered morose by a gray beard that, if left to thicken and grow paler, would look like Fred Sanford’s.

“Emmitt, your gray facial hair has put you in a rocking chair,” Frazier says.

“Your beard is weird,” Hernandez adds.

“Your ’stache is trash,” Frazier chimes in.

“Oooh, it’s bad,” Smith moans. His bonus for coloring his beard is not a date (although cheerleaders celebrate his renewal) but a touchdown in the Orange Bowl.

“He scores!” Hernandez and Frazier say, once more as one, from the sideline.

(Take note, viewers: Hernandez’s hair and mustache look especially black.)

Just for Men prefers that Hernandez’s mustache be of a continually dark hue; the company does not mind if he keeps his hair dark, too, but his deal is strictly facial. Two executives have the additional corporate assignment of contacting him when they spot his color fading and suggest that it is time for a touch-up.

“During the season, I use it quite a bit,” said Hernandez, the Mets’ former first baseman. “I can’t have gray.”

Lerch said, “When we remind him, it’s more like kidding him.”

Frazier needs no such reminders from the home office in White Plains; he is so fastidious about hiding the encroaching gray. But in the off-season, invisible to his gel masters, Hernandez lets the gray show in the signature facial hair that was voted the top sports mustache ever last year by the American Mustache Institute. — Richard Sandomir | New York Times

"Rap Devil" by Machine Gun Kelly | Produced by Ronny J

Oh my god, Ronny

[Verse 1]
Ayy, somebody grab him some clippers (zzzzt)
His fuckin' beard is weird
Tough talk from a rapper payin' millions for security a year
"I think my dad's gone crazy," yeah, Hailie, you right
Dad's always mad cooped up in the studio, yellin' at the mic
You're sober and bored, huh? (I know)
'bout to be 46 years old, dog
Talkin' 'bout "I'ma call up Trick Trick"
Man, you sound like a bitch, bitch
Man up and handle your shit (ugh)
Mad about somethin' I said in 2012
Took you six years and a surprise album just to come with a diss
Homie we get it, we know that you're the greatest rapper alive
Fuckin' dweeb, all you do is read the dictionary and stay inside
Fuck "Rap God," I'm the Rap Devil
Comin' bare-faced with a black shovel
Like the Armageddon when the smoke settle
His body next to this instrumental, I'm sayin'

I'm sick of them sweatsuits and them corny hats, let's talk about it
I'm sick of you bein' rich and you still mad, let's talk about it
Both of us single dads from the Midwest, we can talk about it
Or we could get gully, I'll size up your body
And put some white chalk around it (ey)

[Verse 2]
Let's talk about the fact you actually blackballed a rapper
That's twice as young as you (let's talk about it)
Let's call Sway
Ask why I can't go on Shade 45 because of you (brrt)
Let's ask Interscope
How you had Paul Rosenberg tryin' to shelf me (huh?)
Still can't cover up the fact
Your last four albums is as bad as your selfie
Now tell me, what do you stand for? (what?)
I know you can't stand yourself (no)
Tryin' to be the old you so bad you Stan yourself (ha)
Let's leave all the beefin' to 50 (please)
Em, you're pushin' 50
Why you claimin' that I'ma call Puff?
When you the one that called Diddy (facts)
Then you went and called Jimmy (facts)
They conference called me in the morning (what?)
They told me you mad about a tweet
You wanted me to say sorry (what?)
I swear to God I ain't believe him (nah)
Please say it ain't so (no)
The big bad bully of the rap game can't take a fuckin' joke
Oh, you want some fuckin' smoke (what?)
But not literally, you'll choke
Yeah I'll acknowledge you're the GOAT
But I'm The Gunner, bitch, I got you in the scope (brra)
Don't have a heart attack now (no)
Somebody help your mans up (help)
Knees weak of old age, the real Slim Shady can't stand up!

I'm sick of them sweatsuits and them corny hats, let's talk about it
I'm sick of you bein' rich and you still mad, let's talk about it
Both of us single dads from the Midwest, we can talk about it
Or we could get gully, I'll size up your body
And put some white chalk around it (ey)

[Verse 3]
Hello Marshall, my name's Colson
You should go back to Recovery
I know your ego is hurtin'
Just knowin' that all of your fans discovered me (hi)
He like, "Damn, he a younger me
Except he dresses better and I'm ugly
Always making fun of me."
Stop all the thuggery, Marshall, you livin' in luxury (damn)
Look what you done to me
Dropped an album just because of me
Damn, you in love with me!
You got money but I'm hungry
I like the diss but you won't say them lyrics out in front of me
Shout out to every rapper that's up under me
Know that I'll never do you like this fuckery
Still bitter after everyone loves you
Pull that wedgie out your dungarees (hey)
I gotta respect the OGs and I know most of 'em personally (ayy)
But you're just a bully actin' like a baby
So I gotta read you a nursery (nursery)
I'm the ghost of the future
And you're just Ebenezer Scrooge (facts)
I said on Flex anyone could get it
I ain't know it would be you

I'm sick of them sweatsuits and them corny hats, let's talk about it
I'm sick of you bein' rich and you still mad, let's talk about it
Both of us single dads from the Midwest, we can talk about it
Or we could get gully, I'll size up your body
And put some white chalk around it (ey)

Ridin' shotty 'cause I gotta roll this dope
It's a fast road when your idols become your rivals, yeah
Never hesitate to say it to your face, I'm a asshole
Bitch-ass motherfucker
Oh my god, Ronny
Fuck Kells!

[Verse 4]
We know you get nervous, Rabbit
I see Momma's spaghetti all over your sweater
I wish you would lose yourself on the records
That you made a decade ago, they were better
Accordin' to them, you're a national treasure
To me, you're as soft as a feather
The type to be scared to ask Rihanna for her number
Just hold her umbrella-ella-ella
"I'm not afraid," okay Oscar the Grouch, chill on the couch (fuck)
You got an Oscar, damn
Can anyone else get some food in their mouth? (For real)
They made a movie about you, you're in everybody's top ten
You're not getting better with time
It's fine, Eminem, put down the pen
Or write an apology
Over the simple fact, you had to diss to acknowledge me
I am the prodigy
How could I even look up to you? You ain't as tall as me
5'8" and I'm 6'4", seven punches hold your head still
Last time you saw 8 Mile was at home on a treadmill
You were named after a candy
I was named after a gangster (brr)
And don't be a sucker and take my verse off of Yelawolf's album, thank ya (thank ya)
I just wanna feed my daughter
You tryna stop the money to support her
You the one always talkin' 'bout the action
Text me the addy, I'm pullin' up scrappin'
And I'm by my fuckin' self, what's happenin'?
EST captain, salute me or shoot me
That's what he's gonna have to do to me
When he realizes there ain't shit he could do to me
Everybody always hated me, this isn't anything new to me
Yeah there's a difference between us
I got all of my shit without Dre producin' me (ayy)
I know you're not used to me
Usually one of your disses should ruin me
But bitch I'm from Cleveland
Everybody quiet this evenin', I'm readin' the eulogy (shh)
Dropped an album called Kamikaze
So that means he killed him
Already fucked one rapper's girl this week
Don't make me call Kim

I'm sick of them sweatsuits and them corny hats, let's talk about it
I'm sick of you bein' rich and you still mad, let's talk about it
Both of us single dads from the Midwest, we can talk about it
Or we could get gully, I'll size up your body
And put some white chalk around it

Rap God -vs- Rap Devil

"Killshot" by Eminem | Produced by IllaDaProducer

You sound like a bitch, bitch
Shut the fuck up!
When your fans become your haters
You done?
Fuckin' beard's weird
You yellin' at the mic, fuckin' weird beard
We doin' this once
You yellin' at the mic, your beard's weird
Why you yell at the mic? (Illa)

Rihanna just hit me on a text
Last night I left hickeys on her neck
Wait, you just dissed me? I'm perplexed
Insult me in a line, compliment me on the next
Damn, I'm really sorry you want me to have a heart attack
Was watchin' 8 Mile on my NordicTrack
Realized I forgot to call you back
Here's that autograph for your daughter, I wrote it on a Starter cap
Stan, Stan, son
Listen, man, Dad isn't mad
But how you gonna name yourself after a damn gun
And have a man-bun?
The giant's woke, eyes open, undeniable
Supplyin' smoke, got the fire stoked
Say you got me in a scope, but you grazed me
I say one call to Interscope and you're Swayze
Your reply got the crowd yelling, "Woo!"
So before you die let's see who can out-petty who
With your corny lines ("Slim, you're old")—ow, Kelly, ooh
But I'm 45 and I'm still outselling you
By 29, I had three albums that had blew
Now let's talk about somethin' I don't really do
Go in someone's daughter's mouth stealin' food
But you're a fuckin' mole hill
Now I'ma make a mountain out of you, woo!
Ho, chill, actin' like you put the chrome barrel to my bone marrow
Gunner? Bitch, you ain't a bow and arrow
Say you'll run up on me like a phone bill, sprayin' lead (brrt)
Playin' dead, that's the only time you hold still (hold up)
Are you eating cereal or oatmeal?
What the fuck's in the bowl, milk? Wheaties or Cheerios?
'Cause I'm takin' a shit in 'em, Kelly, I need reading material
"Yo, Slim, your last four albums sucked
Go back to Recovery," oh shoot, that was three albums ago
What do you know? Oops
Know your facts before you come at me, lil' goof
Luxury, oh, you broke, bitch? Yeah, I had enough money in '02
To burn it in front of you, ho
Younger me? No, you the wack me, it's funny but so true
I'd rather be 80-year-old me than 20-year-old you
'Til I'm hitting old age
Still can fill a whole page with a 10-year-old's rage
Got more fans than you in your own city, lil' kiddy, go play
Feel like I'm babysitting Lil Tay
Got the Diddy okay so you spent your whole day
Shootin' a video just to fuckin' dig your own grave
Got you at your own wake, I'm the billy goat
You ain't never made a list next to no Biggie, no Jay
Next to Taylor Swift and that Iggy ho, you about to really blow
Kelly, they'll be putting your name
Next to Ja, next to Benzino—die, motherfucker!
Like the last motherfucker sayin' Hailie in vain
Alien brain, you Satanist (yeah)
My biggest flops are your greatest hits
The game's mine again and ain't nothin' changed but the locks
So before I slay this bitch I, mwah, give Jade a kiss
Gotta wake up Labor Day to this (the fuck?)
Bein' rich-shamed by some prick usin' my name for clickbait
In a state of bliss 'cause I said his goddamn name
Now I gotta cock back, aim
Yeah, bitch, pop Champagne to this! (pop)
It's your moment
This is it, as big as you're gonna get, so enjoy it
Had to give you a career to destroy it
Lethal injection
Go to sleep six feet deep, I'll give you a B for the effort
But if I was three-foot-eleven
You'd look up to me, and for the record
You would suck a dick to fuckin' be me for a second
Lick a ballsack to get on my channel
Give your life to be as solidified
This mothafuckin' shit is like Rambo when he's out of bullets
So what good is a fuckin' machine gun when it's out of ammo?
Had enough of this tatted-up mumble rapper
How the fuck can him and I battle?
He'll have to fuck Kim in my flannel
I'll give him my sandals
'Cause he knows, long as I'm Shady he's gon' have to live in my shadow
Exhausting, letting off on my offspring
Lick a gun barrel, bitch, get off me!
You dance around it like a sombrero, we can all see
You're fuckin' salty
'Cause Young Gerald's balls-deep inside of Halsey
Your red sweater, your black leather
You dress better, I rap better
That a death threat or a love letter?
Little white toothpick
Thinks it's over a pic, I just don't like you, prick
Thanks for dissing me
Now I had an excuse on the mic to write "Not Alike"
But really, I don't care who's in the right
But you're losin' the fight you picked
Who else want it? Kells—attempt fails! Budden—L's!
Fuckin' nails in these coffins as soft as Cottonelle
Killshot, I will not fail, I'm with the Doc still
But this idiot's boss pops pills and tells him he's got skills
But, Kells, the day you put out a hit's the day Diddy admits
That he put the hit out that got Pac killed, ah!
I'm sick of you bein' wack
And still usin' that mothafuckin' Auto-Tune
So let's talk about it (let's talk about it)
I'm sick of your mumble rap mouth
Need to get the cock up out it
Before we can even talk about it (talk about it)
I'm sick of your blonde hair and earrings
Just 'cause you look in the mirror and think
That you're Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
Don't mean you are, and you're not about it
So just leave my dick in your mouth and keep my daughter out it

You fuckin'—oh
And I'm just playin', Diddy

You know I love you
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