Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Eminem's Freestyle #1 on Tim Westwood TV



Eminem's Freestyle on Tim Westwood's Radio 1
BBC Radio Show

[Eminem:]
Yo blast me off, Tim!*
Blast me off, son!
Blastin' off right now, son!

I wasn't born mean, I was pushed to treachery*
I walk the streets lookin' for some puss to fetch me
I'm like a veggie, brain is turned to mush I'm edgy
Edgy enough to give Reggie Bush a wedgie
If he dont give me KIM, things could get ugly
So pass that ass to me let me squish the left cheek
And press against the right one till its smushed against me
And leave a dead body in the woods to MC with the Christopher Reeves beef
We started out on the wrong foot, or should I say fake leg made out of wood
I shouldn't, yes I should
Riding through the hood, I'm chillin' with Westwood
I'm quite mellow, a white fellow
My pee is bright yellow, I like Jello, I'm like hello
To a cute little dyke on the mic I'm kinda like...

[Eminem:]
Me and Westwood blastin' off, jackin' off
In a pair of acid washed bumpin' Asher Roth
Cruisin' grassy 'till I damn near crash the car
Tryna smash 'em off in the dash, hit the overpass, went off
Over the bridge into oncoming traffic
Cause a massive forty two car pile-up, not a scratch at all
Hopped up holdin' a axe and saw
Jason mask is off when my face is plastered in tobasco sauce
Spittin' flames, kickin' fire out ur ass you little -
You can pass it on, I'm battery acid dog
You don't wanna get my ass ticked off
I'm harder than playing basketball when I'm going through crack withdrawal
Dick so big it's like elastic, I tie it in a knot and it looks like Mr. Fantastic
Crossed the path of Plastic man with a drastic force...Put my penis on classic sports

[Eminem:]
Once again it's the sinister, cynical, minister Shady
Kryptonite the Superman, he's a dentist to Amy
Administer of the pain, just finished huffin' the paint
And muffle the fumes, like it was nothin, because it aint
Anything in his way, his enemies he just slays
His venomy sprays reaches like beams of energy rays
Menacing stares, he glares making the hairs all on the back of yah neck stand
Like dracula yep, spectacular rep, he's a tarantula, gargantuan
Yah, Angela so I command yah to start dancin'
Part Manson, part Hannibal, part mechanical
Shark,throwing animal parts at Scarlett Johansen
Enter my gas chamber, yah gangsta? My ass
He's got his fangs to your neck, he's set to strangle ya ass, hater
You're facin' a task greater, he's chasin' your ass
He's got his face in a mask, your blood stains on his glass table
I'm checking the exposure of photos of me exposing
exposing myself locked inside of a cozy hotel posing
With or without clothing, next to the decomposing
bodies eroding while I'm dozing off overdosing
Windows opening-shutting, doors opening-closing I think there's a ghost
Too much hydrocordone and codeine
I was only 'sposed to swallow a half, I took the whole thing
I'm not joking, I think I just snorted my nose ring
I need a drink, I'm standing over the sink posing
Myself, self-loathing, cause I'm on a brink, postally
Mostly I don't wanna think this'll make everything rosy
Beverly sings, scream while I'm severing three toesies
Totally frozen while I close in, I'm yodelling "Rosey, won't you come out to play?"
No sense, wasting time, cutting and pasting headlines in the papers
Making shrines of my crimes and capers
My words are whirlwinds, I murder my girlfriends
Go to Europe and put neurophins in my syrup and stirred 'em
You never heard 'em like this, so don't encourage him
The neurosurgeon, coke mirrors, and lyrics worse than
The type of person to get Katie Couric to curse him
Eighty spirits of ladies cause Shady murdered the virgins
Crazy turn of, events that he emerged, took over the world
And reeled in all the children, lured 'em into the building and killed 'em
Buried 'em in the mulch and mildew and he will do what he feels 
And still can spin straw into gold, like Rumpelstiltskin
Cotton to silk, Motrin to Tylenol 3 pills, the Real Slim Shady's entered the buildin'
Ain't nothin' but tumbleweeds up in this bitch, Mildrid
He's ill wit it, he still shouldn't be heeled
There's no one as sick as he MC's will get fricasseed on the grill then

[Eminem:]
You wanna start with the hook first?
You wanna start with the..? Oh..
I have no idea what I'm doing, I have no idea what I'm doing, but
Everybody get up, sit up, Christopher
They're miserable without you, Superman is a-
Live and he's flowin like the Mystic River
Girl don't act like you've never been kissed before
One, two, three, four
Five, six, this uh
Rhyme is about to hit you right in the kisser
How did anybody ever find me I disa-
Peared I was hiding in Freeway's beard, just a
Hop, skip and a jump from my skin, gushin'
Nails into my face that I been pushin'
Hellraiser, my face is my pincushion
It's like when I'm on the mic I can squish a
Sucka like a vicegrip, my pin put ya
In the slaughterhouse cause your style's been butchered
I'll spin chainsaw, take off like the blades on, my brains on
Hyperdrive, someone put the breaks on

[Eminem / Kon Artis:]
Here's a smidget, a midget to get your digits, Bridget
Don't try to fidget with it, ribbit ribbit
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice
Now Here's a smidget, a midget to get your digits, Bridget
Don't try to fidget with it, ribbit ribbit
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice


[Eminem:]
...Cause he gets as busy as a
Bee baby you could throw a frisbee in a blizzard
He'll catch it in his teeth, what is he? He's a wizard
Standing in the disco with a disco biscuit
And I'm pretty sure it isn't biscwit, is it?
Now baby don't forget to bring your lipstick with ya
I want the kiss before I blow this bitch to smitha-
Reens, get the guillotines, this is a situ-
Ation that's critical as Dre spins his, uh
Turn tables and he cuts the record like a scissor
Checka-chicky-checka-chicky-checka-checka-chicka
Who wreck it in a second tell me what the heck is sicker
Wait a minute I just dropped my necklace in the liquor
Now baby just to make a little breakfast and it's six o-
Clock in the morning unless you want to get some dessert

[Eminem and Kon Artis:]
Here's a smidget, a midget to get your digits, Bridget
Don't try to fidget with it, ribbit ribbit
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice
I said Here's a smidget, a midget to get your digits, Bridget
Don't try to fidget with it, ribbit ribbit
I got you slippin' on my swag juice, my swag juice
I got you slippin' on my swag, my swag juice


[Eminem:]
Ayo, just so everybody knows...
That was a hook we made on the way to the radio station
And we were trying to get it right
so we may have fucked it up a couple times or whatever
But, this is what we were trying to like work out before we came here
Especially for Westwood, man! ESPECIALLY for you homie!

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